simply me

hey u.

this is me. Jyn. this is sth just for u.
u may not know that i've wrote this to u and u may not see this. ever.
but somehow. i feel i have to tell u about my feelings.

it was great knowing u. it was great to be wit u.
every time i think of all those little things that u said to me.
all those little things u've done for me.
and all those moments of us together.
all those kissing and hugging.
i felt like i was in love again.
u meant so much to me.
u still do..
coz i cant seem to let it go

it was all so unbelievably fabulous.
the relationship
you and i.
i was unbelievable
u were fabulous.

but it wasnt great at all when u tell me that u donno if u will love me.ever.
it wasnt great at all when u tell me u somehow didnt feel anything for me all of a sudden.
and i felt like shit when u said all u thought of was if i was going to call u. instead of i miss u.

and then.
i knew i had to make a decision.
i know i was selfish . because i don wanna get hurt in the end.
eventho it was so hard.
i had to go. coz i was a chicken.
love takes courage. but i wasnt brave enough.

then i left.
here came another guy.
and he left.
i was left alone again.

then
i saw u.
i thought of u.
i talked about u. all the time.
to everyone.

and i realise.
i finally realise. i have been hurting u.
all this time.

i broke up wit u.
another guy.
and. i called u ignorant and stupid.
i was mean to u.
i am sorry.
i really am.

i just wanted u to know that i have move on.
that i can still be ur fren.
coz i wan to.
but i didnt realise that what i did, what i said.
it was so harsh.
it did hurt didnt it?

will u ever tell anyone it hurt?
will u ever mention it to anyone how u feel?

u used to tell me everything about u.
everything.
u believed in me.
u trusted me.
and i've shattered ur dreams.
the last gal. u said.
there will be no one else.

now that i realise ive hurt u so much.
i donno what to do
what to say.
coz u wont admit even if u do.
or maybe u really don gv a shit about it.

anyway
if i did hurt u.
i am sorry
i really am.

i am sorry.

*unbelievably fabulous*