simply me

CONFESSION


ok ok..
i hv a confession to make..
all these while. i did not mention this on my blog..
ok i gotta admit..
i've been clubbing in kl all this while..

probably not sth special for all of u out there..
as in u g uys might be.. "cheh... i tot wat.."
but it does need courage to tok about this in front of all my frens..
coz ppl hv been labelling..
clubbing=evil..

so how do u define evil?? or.. hmm... cant think of a proper word to describe.. but i guess the norm is..
when a gal goes clubbing..

she drinks
she gets drunk
she dance with strangers
she sleeps wit strangers
she gets involve in drugs
she is wasting her time
she doesnt go for classes
she smokes
she would know "bad guys" and get involve in their life
bla bla bla...
all sorts of assumption would be made
and the conclusion is..
she is a bad gal..

of all above,
i only drink..
coz i hv to admit i like de taste of liquor
and that's all..
i wont get drunk coz..... pls read back one of my post..
yea..
and u know.. i somehow just couldnt stand ppl that i donno touching me..
so strngers don even get to dance wit me AT ALL..

i protect myself when i club..
and the reason i like clubbing..
coz i get to see ppl..
how the way they behave.. attitude..
don believe me??
u just hv to...

i went to rumms with shi jen last night..
just the two of us..
i din drink much coz we cant afford to get a bottle..
so i just took a few sips or beer... " i still prefer liquor"
we were sitting at the bar..
looking at the ppl around us..
for the first time,
i felt empty..
i hv no idea why am i sitting there wasting my time..
hurting myself.. as in drink..
-but i reli reli reli don drink a lot.. coz i am still a beginner.. -
i look at the ppl around me..
why re they here?
to get to know new ppl?
to show of how gd they look??
for me.. i was there becoz of shi jen.. my best buddy!!
he wanted to meet a gal. so i acc him..
wat about these ppl around me.. they come for the same reason??
i donno..
i just felt empty and i should quit..
but i know.. i was just thinking.. coz i couldnt resist the chance for me to 'know'(observe) diff ppl..
u probably think that this is just an excuse..
well.. i donno.. maybe u re right..

anyway.. for those who re worried for me..
don be..
coz i don drink from strangers..
i am a "proud" gal when i go clubbing..
i don talk to any of the strangers..
i don get drunk..
and.. yea.. in conclusion.. i reli reli try very hard to protect myself coz i don wan anything to happen to me coz i don wan my parents to be worry..
do they know?? of coz they don..

so u guys should know wat to do..
keep it from ur parents!! lol..
u know..
i nvr thought that this is anything that i should be proud of..
i reli don..
that's why i've nvr mention 'clubbing'

the truth is i was ashamed..
i know i couldnt take it when ppl think of me as someone which i am not..
but i know.. one day..
someone will know..
and yea..
at least i tell u guys what's happening to me..

promise promise promise
i promise
i wont go as often ..
i'll just study till my final ends..
ok??

love u lots!!!
<3



the hardest part of this confession is..
who my parents re..
so i reli sincerely hope u guys would help me..